November 15, 2010
"You know mumsie," my daughter said, "you make my life so easy by letting me go, not holding onto me and trying to interfere and give me unwanted advice."
I wrote her a letter, so I could explain.
It's so easy my angel, to let you go. I spent eighteen years molding you into a responsible adult. I am confident I have done the best I can, so now it is time for you to fly. Stretch your wings and find your whole potential. Become the woman I know you are. It's time to see what kind of world you can make for yourself.
You have turned out to be a sweet, respectful, outgoing and very responsible young adult. I don't want you moving half way across the world, but I won't stop you or make you feel guilty either. I have had a chance to live my life, and now it is time to step back and let you live yours. No matter what choices you make, and whether I agree with them or not, I will stand by you and support your decisions. I hope I have taken enough time to show you what is right and wrong to enable you to become the best adult you can be.
As much as I want to keep you close, away from the cruelness in the outside world, letting you go in itself, has selfish motives too. I will always be your mother, but now it is time to find out who I am, to discover that person, who is not a mother or a wife. I can take my life off hold. Believe me, it's a strange feeling, and I will screw up too, but as you enter a new stage in your life, so do I.
I could have not asked for a better daughter, a nicer kid or a more wonderful person that you are.
I can't protect you any more.
I can't make your hurt go away.
I tell you I love you and show you I care.
I try to help out when things don't seem fair.
But my power as a mother goes only so far.
I can't always reach the places you are.
I want to be close like we were before,
But you want to move on -- to discover what's more.
When you were a baby, I'd hold you tight,
And keep you forever within my sight.
I could satisfy your every need,
It was an easy time for us indeed.
And when you were a toddler and scraped your knee,
You'd hold out your arms and run to me.
I'd kiss where it hurt and make it feel fine.
A hug and a kiss worked every time.
I was always the one you turned to then.
I wish it could be like that again.
But now when you're sad you turn away,
And I don't know what words to say.
You're my little girl, but you're growing up fast.
I feel you slipping from my grasp.
I want to hold on, but I know it's time
For me to let go of this child of mine.
I long to protect you, to shield you from pain.
But I have to remind myself time and again,
That you have to experience life on your own,
While I stand back and leave you alone.
You're still so young, but you've already found
How kids can be mean when I'm not around.
School kids tease you and call you names.
They make fun of you and play cruel games.
I tell you not to worry, that it'll be alright
I tell you to be brave, yet I can't make things right.
I try to listen and to hold you near,
To give you solace and allay your fear.
I try to be there when the going gets tough.
Sometimes growing up can be so rough.
But I also feel proud of the person you are.
I know that you're strong and that you'll go far.
I realize it's time to start letting go.
I've taught you so much of the things that I know.
As you step forward, I'll take two steps back.
It's not easy for me, but I'll soon get the knack.
I'm letting go, but I'll never be far.
You can always reach me, wherever you are.
I watch you proudly as you start on your way.
My love goes with you as we start a new day.