February 23, 2006
Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness.
Martin Luther King, Jr.
American baptist minister and civil-rights leader. 1929-1968
Today's quote struck a chord within me. I can see the truth in it and see that it applies many regards - business, personal, social, and individual as well as many others. For me, I'd probably put a "self-" in front of the destructive to make it more applicable, but it still works for me. Because of my depression and sense of inferiority, I've walked on that dark side more than my share. There happen to be those sadly misguided individuals that care for me and see some benefit in my continued existence :p. I know my ways have caused their fair share of concern if not pain. They don't deserve that. So, I really have only two options.
- Try to drive them off, which hasn't worked so far.
- Actually, try to be a normal, relatively conscientious human being.
In spite of what my heart and head having been telling me, I've been trying to do better - modifying my diet somewhat, drinking more H2O, taking all of my meds with greater regularity and trying to get to bed at a decent hour. It has had a few effects - actually being somewhat concious in the mornings, lost 8 lbs between doctor visits, and my blasted infection is much improved. Now if I can just get over the antibiotic side effects, I might actually be pretty well off - at least in my view. I can say at the very least that things are moving along in the right direction...for a change.