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Wish Me Luck!! by Dean Atlas
July 2017
20% Cocaine
3out with the ass wipes
5stuck in a pit
7pbackspase agfain
8 never look
9breakfast joint
10super tired
11phenomenally complicated
12level 10 zen master
13internally and externally
14roller coaster of chaos
15slowly faded away
16total annihilation
17crash course
19hate being a human being
28inside me
30crazy bitches
31shit soup

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July 4, 2017

So it's the 4th of July and it makes me wonder why I just don't care. Holidays freak me out. There's this weird obligation to have to do something out in public. They usually stand for things that I don't give a fuck about. I wonder if our forefathers would've still signed the Declaration of Independence if they could've stepped through time and seen what their little social experiment would turn into? Maybe??

Why has my life become so boring and isolated? Oh yeah! Because over many years of bartending I've grown to lose all faith in humanity. I decided awhile ago that I'd rather have a tiny circle of friends around me instead of a drunken revolving door that any wasted asshole could come stumbling though. I really do like it this way. My life is so peaceful now. Finally.

I walked way into the woods behind my house today. It's a maze of logging roads that weave through emerald green gullies filled with flowers, long ferns, and moss. Walked for hours and hours with my dog Maggie. She's a Northwest Terrier and my best friend...well definitely my furriest best friend. She looks like Benji on stilts. Whenever I grab my walking stick from off of the wall, Maggie always knows we're about to go for a walk and starts doing this doggy dance around my room. Stomping and knocking over anything that might unfortunately be in the way of her excitement. My walking stick is truly gnarly. Long, wiry, with hard knots poured all through it. Magically for me it's the same golden color as Maggie. I like to match my clothes when I go out in public. It's awesome having my dog and walking stick hooking me up. Even though I have never seen another person up there.

I really do like roaming around out in the woods. I look for animal tracks and markings. There is a bobcat that lives by my house. I haven't seen any tracks yet but he likes to drop turds right in the middle of the gravel roads. I hope I get to see him eventually and tell him he's kind of nasty.

I looked up several jobs today and have a pretty good list of places I'm going to go check out tomorrow. My job before Jack in the Box was teaching children who have autism how to read and do math. It only lasted a few months cause the owner of the company I worked for got his 3rd DUI and had to go to jail for 8 months. But before the sudden collapse of my employment I really did like my job. There is a couple of jobs I saw that were working with the mentally disabled and I think I'm going to check them out.

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