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Wish Me Luck!! by Dean Atlas
August 2017
1totally obsessed
2 I said STOP!!
3more later
4more fucked up than me
5I gave her fleas
6Patience and persistence
7little Manson families
8full throttle
9 makes me squishy
12square in the balls
13buried pirate treasure
14such a grumpy dick
16spocking out my hog
17bend over big guy
18 perfectly round
19squirrel turds
20constant obstacle course
21poopy pants
22choking a chick
24king of the scene
28older and more moldier

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August 10, 2017

I'm completely exhausted. But it's the good kind of tired. The kind of tired you get because you did so many fun things throughout the day...but yeah... I'm spent.

Went to my job interview early in the day and I believe it went well. My chub for the girl who runs everything isn't as throbbing as it once was but I still think she's very beautiful. For some reason after we talked and she asked me a bunch of questions, I grew to realize she's just as mortal as myself. With insecurities and doubts and I have to admit that it kind of ruined my previous perception of her being some amazing Irish Amazon Goddess. I like doing prep work and it looks like a big kitchen that is clean and organized. I'm pretty sure that I nailed the interview but we'll see.

When I got home I pealed my son off of the Xbox and we went to the lake. Took him to this wonderful waterfall that has always been a magical place for me throughout the years. Very few people know that if you follow the stream behind the falls there is an identical waterfall that is the same dimensions as the first one. I found it all by myself 20 years ago and have only met a few people that I've ever talked to that know it's there. Couple of game wardens and hiking enthusiast but it's a super secret even among the locals in the area. I didn't remember the hike being so treacherous and steep though. It's through some extremely thick brush and intense terrain. We had to climb using tree roots but it was more like climbing up a never ending tree. My son is 9 and getting more agile by the day but it still scared the fuck out of me for most of the climb. I'm totally way to over protective when it comes to him being o.K. I love that little dude more than anything I've ever known so he's not going to get permanently wounded on my watch. So I always stayed between him and any serious danger but it wasn't easy. Unfortunately the trail had been washed out and we tried to make it through what we thought was the new path but half way up the super steep cliff we realized that we had taken the wrong path. By the time we had gotten back down to the river we were both worn out and ready to head back to the main trail. I showed him the direction to the next falls and I have a weird feeling that someday years from now (maybe after I'm long gone) he will go back and find that waterfall.

After we got back to the car we drove around the lake and went to this place that is called Pirates Cove and is also kind of a local secret. Nobody was there so we had the lake all to ourselves. My son is finally starting to embrace swimming so for a couple of enchanted hours we just laughed, splashed, dove, chortled, snorkeled, chuckled, floated, and giggled while just being a couple of dorks enjoying our moment in the universe together. He's such a nice guy. Innocent, kind, gentle, smart, compassionate, and I believe like most parents feel about their children...he's destined for great things someday. Maybe not historical things but at least change the situation he is in at the moment to be a more positive place than it was before he arrived.

I'm starting to teach him one of my long time traditions of picking up some trash everytime you go to a beautiful place. I do it anytime I go to a beach or playground or wherever that's beautiful and outside. Almost anytime I go to a beach I immediately find a old flimsy plastic store bag and I dust it off and start putting whatever trash I find lying around. If every person just picked up one thing when they went anywhere gorgeous in the world... wouldn't the world be so less cluttered and nasty. It makes you feel good too when you get home and throw away the trash you picked up...well at least it always makes me feel better. I think my son digs doing it too so right on:)

The no smoking thing is truly solidified now. I had no mood swings or urges at all today. Fuck Yes I made it!! The key now is to never do it again no matter how bad life might suck sometimes in the future. Don't ever suck on that cigarette thinking it will ease the pain. I have to look at it like it's not just having that one single smoke... but it means I'm smoking for the rest of my life. Never going back again. I won!!

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