Happiness is a Butterfly by Marchen
February 2019
10A reboot
18I think Im alone now
I think Im alone now
February 18, 2019

“Its only when I am alone that I really feel connected to the entire universe.”
― Nurudeen Ushawu

The small waves tumble to the beach and die with a crashing whimper. My toes dig into the warm sand and I watch the sand fall off as I wiggle them. The breeze caresses my face as the sun gently warms me through my thin clothing. I moved across the country to find myself. I am enjoying my solitude and find comfort in it yet ….

I have this strange feeling, and I am big enough to acknowledge that it is a feeling of loneliness. It is not because of a lack of friends but it’s a feeling inside me. Even when I'm surrounded by people I don’t feel connected. There is a spark deep in my soul that I don’t seem to be able to kindle into a flame. I don’t have that one special person anymore.

I put on a front. I hide what I don't want others to see. My body language and laughter conveys one thing, but my heart truly knows what I'm feeling. I'm feeling lonely, even when I'm not alone.
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