|I've arrived? |
August 17, 2018
Most of the information could be or has been handled in an email. I guess it's just an excuse to get us all together both in our departments and as a college. I admit it was nice to see some people I haven't seen since May or before, but others who cares?
Now that I'm a lecturer I have to make nice with the higher-ups, attend the meetings, and play by the rules. There are a couple of women who I admire greatly who have a knack for playing the game, nodding where appropriate, and expertly schmoozing the fat cats; oh to be able to play like they do; smile and then knife them ever so slowly in the soft underbelly.
Nah, I'm a straight shooter, I'll tell you if I think the idea is bullshit/waste of time or brilliant, but I have a far better way of saying it. Words do have power.
I had lunch with Squiggy before the meetings. She and I talked about families, vacations, and upcoming responsibilities including her being the director of the MA in Communication: Leadership and Activism. My ears perked right up on that. One of the perks of being a lecturer is access to professional development including tuition reimbursement or free in some cases. You can bet your sweet ass the Uni is paying for ole LA to get another Master's Degree. However, due to this assignment, one of the projects we had been discussing has to be tabled for a while, and honestly, that's okay right now.
At the department meeting, I happened to sit with both of my former office mates, who have are now friends too. BUT, OMG, both of them were so negative. Both have hurt themselves, have had family woes, and it was murderously hot today, but ack...crab, crab, crab about everything. I didn't really want to hang out with them. (FYI: I decided some time ago not to fall into that FML mentality.) They seriously brought me down.
The chair blabbed on about all kinds of stuff, and new faculty was introduced including the 8 other TAs who were converted into lecturers. The chair said our names, degrees, accomplishments, and a fun fact about each of us. After my name, he said MA in Teaching and BA English/Women and Gender Studies both at our Uni, poems published in the Uni's art and literary magazine, and a fun fact about her is she put herself through college driving a school bus. Who told??!!?? I'm pretty sure I've kept a lid on that. Not that I'm ashamed, hell no, but my business is mine, ya know?
Then, at the college meeting, he introduced me again without the bus driving bit, and as I had listened before to a treatise of people's accomplishments, I was overwhelmed to be on a list so distinguished with people an incredible array of degrees, experiences, and publications. I was floored. I pretty much dismiss my education as something anyone could acquire, but me, I did that too, and I work with these people and a host more who are incredibly talented in a myriad of ways.
Me!!! So it was this moment where I finally felt the gravity of my success, where that piece of paper finally meant something to someone other than me. It was a proud, profound, and life-defining moment. As Brian told me a few weeks back, "Welcome to the BIG TIME, bitch!"
I'll take that on a Friday
Love and Belief~