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Confessions of a Neurotic Single Mom by Homemade
August 2008
1F*ck You, Cindy!!!!/The Boys/Small Talk
4Running Scared
5Nurses With Big Asses
6Hi, My Name is..../ Minus 1
7Land Contract
8Thunder Rolls
9Cant Think of a Title Today
10Guilt Trip
11Random Stuff/bullshit
12The Way It Will Be
13Another Blank Title
14120 Days
15Sky Blast
17Going Private Again
18High Flyin'
20Broken Bones, Part 2
21No motivation
22A JenBee Kinna Day
23Saturday, no excitement
24Code Purple
25First Day of School
26Control Freak, Extraordinaire
27Making Progress
28Who Works on Thursdays Anyways???
29Baby Come Back!/ 20 cents of nonsense
31Picnic in Erie

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120 Days
August 14, 2008



Why do i keep waking up as if i got drunk the night before? Whoa... totally not liking this feeling. Wonder if this is what mental exhaustion feels like. Oh well, cry yourself a river sister.

Yesterday was good.

Dave and I left here at 5am. We got down there a little bit before 8am. We found the place ok, and pulled in. We sat there a few minutes, I told Dave I was hungry so we typed in directions for Burger King into his phone, we got lost 3 times looking for it, said screw it and went into the McDonalds aka Poopyplace so i could change, and get a bite to eat.

We got back to the courthouse by 830 and just went in and sat down. A few minutes after us the POS came in, wouldn't even look at me or Dave, and sat down. 5 minutes later, Sophies toothless, dirty Mom came in, and sat down beside the POS, wouldnt even look us either. By this time, all i could was laugh, because it was funny. Dave was so fucking nervious he was shaking, and he was scared. He's thinking they are only here to fight. CYS comes a few minutes after and says hello and asks if we have "met" before. lol Dave says yeah and thats it. CYS says Sophie will be coming in a few minutes. So, we just sat there, I wispered to Dave "What the fuck where YOU thinking" about him with Sophie's Mom, cause, OMFG.. the woman was UGLY on top of having no teeth.. it was so laughable... all he could say was she didn't look like that back when. Sophie shows up a few minutes later. She waves at Dave and walks right past us and sits down with her mom and POS. That upset Dave.. He gets to thinking, oh maybe she doesn't want to live with us. I tell him not to worry, relax.

So, the whole time Sophie is sitting there, mom and POS are fawning all over her, playing with her hair, touching her, making little jokes, holding her hand.. I told Dave they are just trying to make you jelious, just relax. A few minutes later, Sophie gets up and comes over to sit with us, I scoot over so she could sit beside Dave. She has a really bad headcold. She sounds terriable. She tells Dave she STILL wants to come live with us. You could literally see the strain fall right off his face. CYS comes out and tells POS that her laywer needs her in the courtroom. We sit there a few minutes more and chat. Dave tells Sophie again that she probably wont be coming with us, and tells her that he's going to agree with the recommendation only because its the fastest way to get her with us. We then get called into the courtroom.

We walk in, Dave, Me, Mom and Sophie all sit together. It was weird. lol POS is sitting at one of the tables in front, we were in the back, like spectators. The judge comes in, we stand up, he sits, we sits. The judge says something about us all agreeing with the recommendation, the laywer for CYS says yes, POS says yes, judge asks Dave if he does, Dave says yes, Lawyer hands the judge the recommendation, he doesnt even READ it, says the recommendation stands, smacks his hammer and its all over. Less then 60 seconds and its over.

Sophie goes to another group home a hour from here, which is fantastic!!!! Woohooo no more 3 fucking HOUR drive. She will be there for up to 120 days, in which time, if they feel she gets better and her behavior is in check, she will come to live with us and Dave will have custody of her. She will get reevaluated up there to see if all those meds are really nessesary. If they don't, when we get her, she will be taken off some of them. CYS was taking her up there this morning.

So, we leave the courtroom, and go down one floor to CYS so Dave can fill out some paperwork concerning his fincial crap. They crame us all in one little room to do it. Dave has to go down to the van and get his shit. So, Im sitting there listening to Sophie's Mom's info. She isn't working. Shes on SSI and gets food stamps. I'm really getting a good look at her now. She is D.I.R.T.Y. Dirt under every one of her finger nails, dirt under her toenails.. yuck. Dave comes back, we all get up, she takes Dave to another room and we go out to this waiting room and sit, i sit beside her... We all know i have no sense of smell...BUT OH MY GOD.. I could smell her. I told Dave it had to be funk.

A few minutes later, CYS comes out with Dave, says we are done, we could have Sophie for the day, at least till 2:30pm. POS stays and chats with CYS and we leave. We give So[hie a few minutes with her Mom, who was crying. Dave told her we'd work something out with her being able to see Sophie, which, i doubt will happen. He's pissed with the way things have went, he isn't going to make the effort, her mom will have too. She told Dave she doesn't have a car, but she's "working on it". I did tell Dave he's got to let it go. He's got her within arms length now and thats all that matters.

We leave and Sophie asks if we could go to the mall. She directs the way so we don't get lost. We go into JCPEnnys and Dave tells her she can spend $50 (my money) she gets 2 cute pairs of jeans and this UGLY shirt. All the while, we all chat, and Dave throws some questions in here and there. We then have lunch at Taco Bell, she was starved. Mom gave her this pretty bracelet and I gave her this matching watch, she loved it and said thank you. We sat there a while, chatting, she played on Dave's phone, on myspace, showing us some pictures of her.


We leave there and go over to Walmart and roam around. She did ask Dave for some hair color and he buys it for her. We were going to sit down in the McDonalds there in Walmart, but the place was so packed we just decided to go back to the playground thats down the street from the Home. Her and Dave play basketball for a while. She told Dave that she liked it when he watched her played. That , i think, melted his heart. After they played a bit, we all went over and sat down in the shade. He asked her some more stuff, asked her if she had any pictures of herself when she was little, she said nope, her mom never took pictures, never had her pictures taken in school. Dave was pissed. He told her that wouldn't happen with us. Then we got into the discussion of the rules here, and the way we do things, and that as long as she behaves, it will be cool, that we are basically pretty easy going parents, really. He told her just to keep her nose clean when she goes to this new place and do what she's told, and she will get out early, they told her that.

We went up to the home, and she asks them if we could stay longer and they said sure. So, we went outback, and just hung out. She asked me to color her hair and I did. She played on Dave's phone some more, they chatted some more, at at 4 we left. You could tell she was tired, on top of all the meds and being sick, she probably crawled in bed and died when we left.

Dave said that he was happy with the way things went, now she's closer, away from them, thats all he could ask for. IN the meantime, we are going to call and find out what the visitation is up there, and all that happy stuff, hopefully we can go see her this sunday.

The only yucky thing about this all was Dave stopping the child support to POS. Because they put a hold on it, it holds mine, and if we dont call and have them release it manually, I aint getting it. That pisses me off. Here it is Thursday, I should of had it Tuesday. Dave called yesterday and she said she released it, but I still don't have it, I'm going to have to call her today to see if she did.

So, there it is. In less then 120 days, we shall have his daughter, hopefully, it depends all on her.


Today we have that game in Pittsburgh. I have to get this place picked up, take a trip to walmart to get snacks for the kids.

Gonna get started in a little bit.

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