August 18, 2008
Yesterday was Noah's Birthday. 12. Still.hard.to.believe.
Growing up way to fast before my eyes. We had plans to go see Sophie and then to my Dads farm, but Dave went to see Sophie alone, and me and the kids went to Dads. We had fun, the kids flew their kites and Dad, Noreen and I just BS'ed.
Noah had his orentation at the high school today. He got a full dose of how tough its going to be. He was totally overwhelmed. His classes are all over the school, none of them are grouped together or are close. Maybe this is the wake up call he needs to straighten up. I was telling fuckhead the other night, with these kids, i don't think they will gradually "grow up" like most people do, i think with all three of them, its just going to be, them waking up one day and BAM, they are grown up, like a cold shot to the face. Reality will slap them out of it. I know that is exactly what happened with Dave. Up until a few years ago he was the same way. Playing around, thinkin' his ass was cool, and then one day he wakes up and realizes, i got 4 kids i have to take care of, WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING?? And ever since he's been on my ass about working, paying the bills on time, not waiting, wanting the house SPOTLESS, etc, etc. Which, I'm grateful and thankful for, but he's so bad now that its smoothering, Myself, I'm a control FREAK, I don't like being told what to do, or someone trying to control me, and thats why we fight so much.
BUT, anyway (where'd that come from??)I guess Sophie is doing ok, they made Dave bring home all her clothes, she's not allowed to have them there. They have uniforms. We have tentitive plans to see her Sunday unless Dave pulls the same shit and he ends up going alone again.
As for the private setting, for now, I need this place for my thoughts, private thoughts, somewhere he has no business